There is that one person, though. that one special person that is such a natural and pure and true love, that you can't help but fall in love. That you would take the heartbreak just to get to spend that time with them.
Philophobia: fear of emotional attachment; fear of being in, or falling in love. There is no real love to be found in toxic relationships, and the only emotional attachment you will form will be an unhealthy one.