this is not what love is supposed to look like. It's not supposed to feel like you're drowning and you're scared you won't be able to take another breathe again. Alone but given away. Here but not. Not smiling or crying, just, confusion and rocks that turn into boulders in your throat. Not walking or stitting, just standing and observing. Watching life go right for people but stay frozen for you. So cold yet so chokingly hot and uncomfortable. This is not love. If it is, it's killing me.
With an undefended heart, we can fall in love with life over and over every day. We can become children of wonder, grateful to be walking on earth, grateful to belong with each other and to all of creation. We can find our true refuge in every moment, in